Cross-Written.Com

Today I read more than one writing about forgiveness. I am wondering what happened nowadays. I am questioning why everybody is busy writing and thinking and even discussing about it. I took some time to think and I get a conclusion of it. It is not a simple thing. It is not a lesson which is easily to be learned. It is not that easy to forgive others. At least, it is not that easy for us but not for Him.

God, Himself, is a lover. He loves us more and more than our love to Him. He even sacrificed Himself for us. Nobody has the love as amazing as His love. He did it without any understandably reasons. Look at us. We are evil. We are mean. We often being unfaithful to Him. He forgive us and still love us. We should have been perished, but He offers His life for us. We are saved by Him.

When I look at myself, I realize. I am bad. I am an evil. Why? I can not forgive others just because a simple thing. When someone - whom I love - forget to call me, I am mad at him/her, when someone - whom I love, again - ignore me, I am vicious to him/her. This is not love! This is compromise (I took this statement from India movie, lol).

There is no reason to love someone. When you love someone, you will simply forgive him / her for their mistake. People makes mistake, so do I. God himself teach us to pray:

It is not just a pray. He teach us to ask Him to forgive us just like we forgive others. How many times we forgive others? how many times we reject to love others? How many times we think that we already forgive them while we still bury that evil feelings in our heart? How many times our lips says “I forgive you” while our heart says, “Just wait for my revenge” or “You will eat that someday” or just a simple “Whatever”.

I suddenly hear my heart says, “Shame on you! how many times you hate people just because they hurt you? How many times your heart keep those bad things about them?” Well, this is okay. I still can bear this kind of shouts. But then I hear the last soft voice in my heart says, ” How many times you hurt Him?”

I hurt Him? when? where? I always try to do the right things. I always think to do the good things for Him. I am learning. I am not perfect. Then that voice said, “You are not learning, you are grumbling and whining” Then I said, “Oh, do I?”

Then that glance of scenes appear again in my mind. What did Jesus do when those crowded people shouting at him, spitting at him and crucifying him… He was not whining. He was not grumbling. He did it and He received it all. He fulfilled God’s plan. He even asked God to forgive them. I repeat. He even asked God to forgive them. What kind of heart is that! How could He had that kind of love? I am stunned. I stand and freeze.

What have I done?